How to deliver performance feedback that sticks.

Published: Mon, 06/15/15

Don't throw out that feedback sandwich yet!

I was recently asked to be a columnist at CIO.com, the online presence for Chief Information Officer (CIO) magazine.. I'll be sharing with you my posts from my column, "Navigate the Workplace." This is part 1 of a 2-part post, published 5/28. Be on the lookout for part 2 soon!


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Have you heard of the feedback sandwich? 

It’s when you start with something positive, share what needs to change, and finish with something positive.

The concept has been around a long time. From what I gather, the foundation of it is sound. Over the years, it's gotten misinterpreted to where it’s applied something like this:

“Good to see you. You’re always so prompt. You need to make sure your presentation skills don’t put people to sleep. Oh by the way, you write a good email too.”

I'm stretching it a bit in my example, but you get my point. Neither slice of bread goes with the filling. People in my circle are pretty jaded about the feedback sandwich approach. So what do you do?

Make the feedback sandwich palatable.

Here’s one way you can make the feedback sandwich work (after requisite greetings).

“We’ve been working together on your presentation skills for awhile now. You seemed a lot more confident in the meeting this week. I don’t know if you noticed that some people seemed lost in the detail at certain points though. Let’s review what you covered. What areas do you think could be simplified? Let’s learn from that so next time we can be sure your audience gets the very important point you are making.”

What do you notice?
  • The entire paragraph is about the same subject. The sandwich hangs together.
  • You use a specific example.
  • You leave them with hope and action.

Seems straightforward enough, right? Not so fast.

Let’s take my example and pull it apart.

With a real human in front of me I probably would not say it all in one shot. This brings me to my “don’t” list.

  1. Don’t just get it over with. It's easy to want to blurt it out all at once. Slow down. Pause. As humans we can only take in so much at one time. A person is likely to hear even less when feeling discomfort -- like when receiving performance feedback.
  2. Don’t say too much at one time. My guideline to my clients is “2 sentences, then a question.” This is particularly important when giving feedback. You want to give people time to digest, think, respond and engage. Now your employee can play an active role in planning skill-building.
  3. Don’t feel compelled to fill silence. One of my favorite cautionary tales is about the manager I observed who talked for 18 minutes straight when delivering performance feedback. No pauses. That behavior does not lend itself to a two-way conversation.
Why do you want a two-way conversation?

You don’t have to do all the talking. Your work is to grow awareness and responsibility for development, in your employee. You do this mostly by listening and asking questions. This interaction does not have to come across as a downer. This is where hope and action come in.

Your employees are more likely to act when actively engaged in planning. You are guiding them, with encouragement. You are making sure they have something specific to do coming out of the conversation, even if you are going to help them. Leave them with hope and action.

One more thing – confirm what they heard.

The only way you can know for certain what they understand is to hear their thoughts. If you ask, “Do you understand,” that’s a start. The person is unlikely to say no. If you get a “yes,” even if it is sincere, how can you be sure the understanding is really there? Try instead, “What are you taking away from this discussion today?”
Putting it all together.

Now you know what to avoid, and also how  you can make the feedback sandwich work. Be on the lookout for another post where I get more specific about what you can do betwen the start and the end of the discussion to ensure it prompts two-way interaction.

At least now you have a place to start, without throwing out that sandwich.

Image: BigStockPhoto contributor B-D-S.
My Best,
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P.S. "I'll pay you $1000 to have that conversation for me."

That's what one of my clients told me when we were talking about a difficult message he needed to deliver to an employee. While on a break in one of my classes he nearly groaned about a discussion he needed to have with an employee later than afternoon. This particular class was about how to deliver this kind of message using coaching skills. I blurted out what he could say, and thus the VERY generous offer came out of his mouth. He was only partly kidding.

But you don't need me to deliver these messages for you. You can learn to do it, with coaching and confidence. Got a "groaner" coming up? Signup for an Empower Hours Select program to strategize and practice how you can get through it, and leave your employee with hope and confidence for the future. And it doesn't have to cost $1000.



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About Mary Schaefer: I'm a coach and trainer for managers of people and anyone else committed to their own development and advancement.  My belief is that your key to success is self-empowerment.  Click here to find out more about what I mean by this and what it can mean for you.

Question? Comment? Click reply and let's talk.
Do you know the 3 essential conversations you need to have with your boss?
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It can sometimes be hit-or-miss when you to have a meaningful conversation with your boss about topics like those in this guide.

Whether you are a new employee or you have a manager who is new to you, it’s always good to make sure the two of you cover — in more than just a superficial way — topics like what your boss considers a high priority or what kind of situation justifies you calling them at home.  These situations can be fraught with assumptions and differing expectations.  Good to get them discussed before they cause a falling out.

Take a moment now to claim your free guide to the types of topics you really need to talk about.  It’s so much easier to cover these before something blows up. 

The Newly Revamped Empowered Manager's Success Kit
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If you are a manager with employees or an aspiring manager, the tips, tools, and tales shared in the newly revamped Empowered Manager’s Success Kit can help you learn to:
  • Unearth what motivates that employee you can’t quite figure out.
  • Respond effortlessly to that curve your employee just threw you.
  • Stop dreading delivering performance feedback.
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  • Put mechanisms in place to keep you and your employees on track.
(It doesn’t even matter if you supervise employees or not, you can adapt these tactics to learn to work with a tough boss or co-worker who has you puzzled.) 


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